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As part of his efforts to get back at CPO Pertwee, after the latter becomes the object of Heather's affections, Sub Lt. Phillips plots to have the chief sent away for a Hovercraft pilot training course, only for Pertwee to return the favor, by convincing Captain Povey that Mr. Phillips and Commander Murray want to attend the same course!

Opening remarks[]

  • Robin: Now I do realise that you've all been doing your best to replace the saucy Lillian Gish calendar that was pinched out of my office at Broadcasting House, but I still haven't got another one.
  • Pertwee: A few more weeks mate and it won't be worth it.
  • Robin: On the contrary, no matter how late in the year, saucy Miss Gish is always worth it. Besides, the pictures of her for November and December are the sauciest.
  • Pertwee: Huhu, you dirty old devil.
  • Robin: Mr Pertwee, I am not a dirty old devil. I'm a connoisseur.
  • Pertwee: You're a con-a-what?
  • Phillips: Connoisseur.
  • Pertwee: What's one of them, then?
  • Phillips: Well in his case its, um, ha, ha, ha, ha - a dirty old devil!
  • Robin: No it is not! It merely means that when it comes to art I know what I like.
  • Murray: Quite! And now we've got a fair old idea of what you like as well. Huh, ha, ha.
  • Robin: Well, really. I'll never get any sense out of them now so I may as well leave them to squabble among themselves, and squabble they will because C.P.O. Pertwee's been out with WREN Chasen for the evening again and Mr Phillips has heard about it. Or at least, he will hear about it shortly.

Navy Lark Season 7
Taking Some Liberties I Smugglers in the Solent I Mr Murray is Victimised I The Poveys Move House I Captain Povey Reports Sick I Admiral Pertwee's Fleet I Let Loose with a Chopper I Making a Right Pig's Breakfast I The Mysterious Pudding Mine I The Hovercraft Training Course I Sabotaged Floggle-Toggle Box I The Potarneyland Training Exercise I Going on Leave to Croydon