Opening remarks
- Michael: When Edison Bell invented the telephone, he really didn't know what he was doing to everybody. Jolly useful for chatting up one's friends but it also means people who aren't friends can get at you and be terribly rude without the risk of being belted in the boosh. 'Owever for Captain Povey...
- Phillips: I say, Sir. Did you notice that? He dropped an H when he said however.
- Murray: Who did? Oh, Mr De Morgan. Now I'm not surprised. He's always doing it.
- Pertwee: Yeah, yeah he does it on the telly as well, Sir. He's the one who says 'And ere is the news.
- Michael: I do nothing of the sort.
- Phillips: Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. You do you know. You 'oist south combs over the 'ebrides as well.
- Michael: I do not.
- Murray: You can't say meteorological office.
- Michael: Oh yes I can. The metereor.... Meet...teroligical... Meetyer... aereology
- Pertwee, Phillips, Murray: You see!
- Michael: Oh shut up. In any case, I bet you can't say it either.
- Phillips: Say it. He can't even spell it.
- Murray: Oh now, now that's not fair. He can't even spell Pertwee.
- Pertwee: Oh yes I can. Yaha what? Spell Per..ya-hey. P... U... R... no, P, P doub... P doub... No, wait a minute. P, P E A double Per, Pertwee, well no that can't be right. P O E
- Michael: As I was saying, ha, ha, ha, ha, for Captain Povey the horrible hubbub and hubalaboo caused by the tintabulation of his telephonic communication bell always heralds hiatus, horror and hell for him. Today is no h'eckseption as Old Thunderguts will shortly discover.
