- Barri: They say that everyone in the world has a double somewhere.
- Admiral: Yes that's right, mine's waiting for me in a small glass round at the local and you're paying.
- Ironbridge: Good show, yes, yes. Everybody round to the pub, yes, yes.
- Barri: Of course there's the word double, meaning pair.
- Ironbridge: Pair! Ooh, yes, yes. Bigguns, yes, yes. Cairo's the place you know, yes, yes.
- Barri: Well there's double fault too, as in the game of tennis.
- Heather: Or there's an even bigger double fault if the Chief's mother and father had had twins.
- Pertwee: Oh charming!
- Barri: And of course there's double as in double date.
- Phillips: Ha, ha, ha, ha. I went out on a double date last night. Ha, ha, ha. They were twins.
- Pertwee: Did you have a good time, Mr Phillips?
- Phillips: Ha, ha, ha. Yes. And no.
- Barri: There's another and somewhat more sinister double, and that is Double Agent.
- Phillips: Eh?
- Murray: What?
- Pertwee: Pardon?
- Phillips: Gosh, does that mean James Bond is now 0014?
- Pertwee: Oh hardly, Sir. Otherwise he'd be working for MI10.
- Murray: Huh, ha, ha, huh. All I can say about doubles is, ha, ha, ha shut, shut, up, up, you, you, two, two. Ha, ha, ha. Really? A play on words. Oh, go on, laugh!
- Phillips and Pertwee: No, no, thanks, thanks.
- Barri: Be quiet the lot of you and pay attention to your Common Market duties. Now there's a load of North German muck coming your way in Kiel because there's another double I haven't mentioned. That is when one person, or thing, looks exactly like another. In this case it's Troutbridge. So you'd better get back on board from shore leave in Herman's Hole In The Wall Club in Kiel or Captain Povey will be forced to put down his dodgy book and assume command of the ship so, get moving! At the double, we have ways of making you run!
|The Montezuela Revolution I The Island Swordfish I Bunged in the Brig (a.k.a. Bunged in the Rattle) I Kangaroo Polka (a.k.a. Kidnapped Down Under) I The Digital Isles Go Unstable I Egbert Hitches a Ride I Povey an Admiral at Last I The Bergan Horse Trials I Captain Povey's Wig I Brain Pill I Operation Showcase (a.k.a. Demonstrating Their Fire Power) I Living the High Life (a.k.a. CPO Pertwee Yachtmonger) I The Talpinium Shell|