- Robin: Now then, about this saucy Lillian Gish calendar that was nicked out of my office at Broadcasting House. Well it hasn't been returned yet and I haven't been able to find a new one. Somebody did send me a calendar but that was made up of 12 highland scenes of bonnie Scotland in natural colour. It's a sweet thought, but to be honest it's just not the same as 12 scenes of saucy Lillian Gish in natural colour. Well time is running out and Boyle doesn't intend to wait until November to get a new calendar. Boyle's giving everybody one more week to give him another saucy Lillian Gish calendar or return the old one. After that Boyle is going to chat up Barlow, Fancy Smith, John Watt, Dixon of Dock Green, Perry Mason, the lot! The hunt will be on! Robin Boyle, announcer of this parish, can turn very nasty when he's roused.
- Pertwee: Yeah so can we, so belt up about your calendar and get on with your scene setting, cheerful chat.
- Robin: Pardon?
- Pertwee: Not likely, I'm not chancing that lot again.
- Robin: That's a pity!
- Murray: You should now by now Mr Boyle, announcer of this parish, Pertwee always quits when he's ahead.
- Robin: Yes, possibly, but at the moment he's only just ahead at the stores. Any second now his dream of a gamble giving him a rich future is going to turn into a nightmare.
- Pertwee: Eh? Good morning! (Whoosh fx)